You Will Be Abandoned

There Is A Price To Be Paid For Courage

If there is one consistency in Courageous Leadership it is the painful reminder that this rare trait of great leaders is often lonely, confusing and isolating. While it may not have yet happened to you, you should be aware that the possibility is real and that will help you deal with the trauma associated with it.

The failure to not prepare will risk the principles you stand for and often times cause you to question your actions.

Unfortunately, I’ve dealt with this more than I care to share but I’ll give you one example.

Many years ago I was serving as a board member with our police union. Our agency was facing a consent decree brought on by a potential settlement in a case that had no merit. One police officer took one promotional exam and sued because he didn’t pass the test. You have to mentally jump the countless successful minorities that did pass the test to even consider race was involved with the failure of a not so smart guy to pass an exam, but that is what the lawsuit said. It was easily defended and would have been easily beaten but cowardice often reigns and our agency was being pressured politically to settle the case.

A mayoral candidate came to the board for an endorsement and I asked him if was going to entertain settling the bogus lawsuit. He looked me in the eye and said no. Where I come from, that is as good as a contract…until the mayoral candidate became mayor and quickly settled the case to the detriment of the agency and our core mission.

I was incensed not that he settled the case but that he blatantly lied and I told the media that. I didn’t see it as controversial because I told the truth and he had lied.

It was my first introduction to betrayal.

I also happened to be sitting at the top of a captain promotional list. When the incoming police chief pushed for the mayor to make the promotion, he denied it. Friends and associates distanced themselves from me.

Somehow, speaking the truth made me the enemy.

It was a painful time in my career. It wasn’t painful that it happened but it was painful because I wasn’t prepared for it. Whether you immediately see it or not, there is a cost for doing what is right.

We have seen this throughout history…

After leading Britain through a World War, Winston Churchill was abandoned by his political party and voted out of office.

Nelson Mandela was imprisoned for 27 years and abandoned by those around the globe.

Malcom X left the Nation of Islam because they believed that races should be separated. Former friends and allies left him and he was ultimately assassinated.

Socrates was abandoned by those that once revered and learned from him and was condemned to death.

Joan of Arc led the French forces to victory and was abandoned by King Charles VII and burned at the stake.

And when the greatest leader of all time, Jesus Christ, was facing death, “all the disciples left Him and fled” (Matthew 26:56).

Your Experience

I am by no means comparing any of my hardships to these leaders but if their greatness experienced the pain of abandonment, why would we be any different? Why would be offered a life of comfort and popularity?

You’ve likely experienced this or observed this on a much smaller scale. Have you ever seen an officer wrongfully accused but those around them act like they are guilty? When that bogus complaint comes in, were you surprised that your “friends” didn’t seem so friendly?

Just as we pre-plan a search warrant service or “what-if” those tactical situations, leaders must prepare for the conflict that will occur with you (a principle based leader) and those that place a priority on popularity.

• Understand, that many of your friends, aren’t actually friends. They are co-workers. When they abandon you, the pain will be lessened.

• Your success is not defined in a promotion or position. It’s defined in doing what is right, no matter the consequences. The former is a temporary status while the latter is legacy.

• Expect to be abandoned. If it doesn’t happen, you are lucky and if it does, you expected it.

• Not everyone will abandon you. This is how you will truly know the courage around you. While small, they will be a mighty force in this world and you played a part in that.

We all want comfort and popularity but the price in that is far worse than the pain of abandonment.

A year after I was sidelined for telling the truth, I took another captain exam and was at the top of the list. The same mayor told the chief to pass me by but this time the chief told him no and promoted me. It wasn’t long after that, Chief Dave Been paid a price for his courage. In a public display of cowardice, the mayor suspended him and embarrassed him in public with false accusations.

While abandoned by some, many in the public saw this act of cowardice for what it was and voted the mayor out of office. Chief Been was brought back under new leadership and retired a few years later.

There has never been a promise that leadership was easy but within the hard and painful parts, you will forge your skills and harden your armor to lead in ways you could never imagine.

This is your choice and it is my hope, that you choose courage…despite the difficulty that could come your way.

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Dr. Travis Yates retired as a commander with a large municipal police department after 30 years of service. He is the author of “The Courageous Police Leader: A Survival Guide for Combating Cowards, Chaos & Lies.” His risk management and leadership seminars have been taught to thousands of professionals across the world. He is a graduate of the FBI National Academy with a Doctorate Degree in Strategic Leadership and the CEO of the Courageous Police Leadership Alliance.